Blogging A to Z Challenge

Just say “NO”!

The requests start almost as soon as you get up in the morning—or maybe even before.

“Mommy, I’m hungry!”

They continue through the morning… “Can you iron this shirt for me?” “I forgot—I’m supposed to take treats today! Can you make something?” “Will you make me waffles for breakfast?”

…and then continue throughout the day… “Would you head up Vacation Bible School this summer?” “How about serving on our committee?” “Can you come over and help me?” “Will you give me a ride?” “Can you help with this project?”

…into the afternoon and evening…”Could you please help me with my homework?” “Will you drive me to practice?” “Can you help me find something?”

…and maybe even until (or after?) you’re asleep…”One more drink of water, please?” “Will you rub my back?”

It’s tempting to say “yes” to any and all requests; after all, it’s nice to feel needed and many of the requests come from people you love or want to help. But if you’re not careful, even those seemingly little requests can end up taking a big chunk of your time and energy. If you say “yes” all the time, to everyone, you’ll take time away from your own home, family, and goals…and will most likely end up feeling resentful and not doing what you do wholeheartedly.

Saying “NO” can require a change in your way of thinking. First of all, it’s OK to say “no”—even if you don’t have a “good” reason for doing so. God doesn’t hesitate to say “no” to us to things He knows are not right, and sometimes that “no” turns out to be a gift—even if we don’t realize it at the time. Likewise, your “no” can be a gift to someone else.

Obviously, you’ll “give” more to your kids and spouse. But again, saying “yes” to every request, big and small, can be overwhelming and leave you without any time for yourself. By meeting every request you also may deprive your family from learning something new, problem solving, and becoming self-sufficient.

If you feel confident in your decision to say “no” to a request, you have no reason to feel guilty about it; no one can “make” you feel guilty—it’s a feeling that you choose to take on. Instead of feeling guilty about saying “no”, choose to feel satisfaction in what you are doing instead.

Here are a few more guidelines for saying “NO”:

• Before you say “no” prayerfully consider the request and open yourself to God’s direction. Even if it’s something out of your comfort zone, it might be something that God wants you to do.
• Ask for all of the details before you make a decision. Find out how much time is involved, where and when it will take place, how often meetings occur, exactly what your job involves, and so on.
• If you need to, buy some time by saying, “Before I answer I need to talk with my husband/check my calendar/see if I can find a babysitter.” Commit to giving an answer within a reasonable amount of time and then give your answer by that time.
• You don’t have to give a reason for saying “no!”

Here are several ways for saying “NO” or compromising when asked to do something that just doesn’t fit into your life at the time.

• “I’m sorry, I just can’t.” (You do not have to give any more of an explanation!)
• “It doesn’t work for me and my family at this time.”
• “We’ve decided to spend more time with our children this year and so are not taking on any additional commitments.”
• “I know I helped last year, but this year I’m not able to.”
• “I can’t help with the fundraiser this year, but I will next year.” (Only say this if you mean it—you will be asked!)
• “That’s not one of my skills or interests, but I could help by…”
• If you don’t want to be in charge of a big project, consider helping with a smaller aspect of it; “I can’t plan the class party, but I will bring snacks.” “I can’t be in charge of Vacation Bible School, but I’ll be glad to help make phone calls to find teachers.”

"For this commandment that I command you today is not too hard for you...the Word is very near to you. It is in your mouth and in your heart so that  you can do it!"

                                                                                        Deut. 30:11, 14

When you use these guidelines you’ll be able to make a wise decision when asked to do something!

(Adapted from the book Home is Where the Mom Is;  A Christian Mom’s Guide to Caring for Herself, Her Family, and Her Home. To see a complete Table of Contents, click on the tab at the top of this blog. Home Is Where the Mom Is is the perfect gift for any mom! Ordering information in the sidebar.)

I’m also blogging at Nebraska Family Times. 

Today’s entry will tell you why and how to start a “Gratitude Journal.” 

A to Z Blogging Challenge: "Independent, Raising Your Kids to Be"

"Independent; Raising Your Kids to Be"

“Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.” Proverbs 16:3

Tim and I have tried to encourage Cody (he’s in his sophomore year of college) and Morgan’s independence appropriate to their age since our kids were young, always having in mind our ultimate goal of them being independent from us (for the most part anyway!).

Here are a few principles of independence we’ve used:

• Prayer. When we encourage our kids to be more independent, whether it’s a tiny step when they’re very young or a much bigger step as they’re older, we pray for God to protect, watch over, and guide them. We also pray that we will encourage the independence they need—it’s a step of faith for parents too!
• When Cody and Morgan were young, “independent” meant small steps like asking an adult in a store a question about where to find something. Sometimes they were reluctant to take these steps to independence, but we were encouraging and pushed them to do so when we knew they were ready. As they became older, we thought about the skills and abilities they’d need as adults (or almost adults) when they were on their own (or almost on their own).
• Encourage age-appropriate steps to independence. I knew it was time for Cody and Morgan to learn to do their own laundry when they complained about how I did it (I put their jeans in the dryer!). They were about 12 and 14 years old and have been doing their own laundry ever since! J
• Be alert for situations that can increase your kids’ independence. When Cody and Morgan were about 8 years old or so Tim started asking them to get supplies at cattle shows. He watched them (without their knowing) at first, until he and they were more confident; gradually they did errands that took them further away from Tim.
• Gradually give more financial independence. Depending on your kids’ opportunity for income, gradually increase what they pay for, or at least partially pay for. There is no “right” or “wrong” way to do this (unless you don’t do it at all!); some parents give an allowance with the expectation that the kids pay for certain things, and some kids get part time jobs to pay for specified items. Tim gave our kids several cows as soon as they were old enough to help with chores.  They got the proceeds from the calves and after the cows were sold, after feed and vet expenses. With their potential for income they’ve been expected to pay for insurance, make care payments, etc. Now their cattle herds are financing their college educations. Figure out what works for your family.
• Talk through “what if” situations with your kids. Before you leave them alone at home, ask “what if” someone came to the door? They smelled smoke? Before you allow them to look at the toys by themselves while you grocery shop, ask “what if” someone you don’t know talks to you? They can’t find you at the designated time?
• Ask your kids what they want to, or need to learn. When I asked Morgan what I needed to teach her before she left for college, her reply was, “More about cooking.” We settled on a few basic recipes which we’ve been making together since then.
• We had to keep in mind the fact that our kids would probably make some mistakes in their quest toward independence. However, we’d rather have them make those mistakes while they were home and we could help them deal with the mistakes (NOT “solve” them, but help them work through the mistakes) and figure out what they could do to prevent making the same mistake again.
• Teach your kids how to get/find the answers. When Morgan’s noticed weird charges on her debit card, we looked over the charges together, figured out when it had been compromised, and she went to the bank to fill out the paperwork and get a new one. When Cody wanted to buy his first vehicle, he made an appointment with the banker to figure out how much money he could borrow (he’s making the payments after selling cattle).
• Reassure your kids that you’ll always be there to help them when needed. Resist the temptation to solve the problem, but instead, help them work through the steps they need to take.

There are many things you can do to encourage independence in all areas of your kids’ lives: encourage them to…

• Pick out cereal while you’re in the next aisle.
• Go back for something you’ve forgotten when you’re in the check-out line.
• Go into your hometown store and purchase something all by themselves.
• Go to the bathroom by themselves in church.
• Have their own checkbook and learn to use it and check their bank statement online.
• Have them call to make their own dentist, haircut, and oil-change appointments.
• Be responsible for homework; in our family our kids knew they could always ask us for help, or to quiz them for a test or proofread a paper, but we weren’t going to continually ask them if their homework was done, or offer to check over it unless they specifically asked. There was a flip side to this; if they didn’t maintain good grades, they couldn’t go to cattle show or out with friends.

Start with small steps toward independence, and the transition to more independence will be much smoother!

How do you encourage independence in your children?

I’m also blogging at Nebraska Family Times 

See my post today about the “Whiney Israelites.”

Blogging A To Z Challenge 
"Hints on How to get Started Writing" 

Ever since I was a little girl I’ve wanted to write. When I was in 2^nd grade I started a “novel” and I vividly remember the satisfying feeling of writing page after page on wide-lined spiral-bound notebooks with a pencil. I’m sure my mom has those “novels” packed away in a box somewhere!

During my adult years I’ve written three books.

• A nurse friend and I (I’m a nurse too) wrote How to Find Your Perfect Job in Nursing after we each had a string of nursing jobs that definitely were NOT “perfect.”
• I wrote Home is Where the Mom Is; A Christian Mom’s Guide to Caring for Herself, Her Family, and Her Home, when my kids were toddlers. I loved being a mom (I still do!) and wanted to share some of the insights I’d had, particularly about being a Christian mom and encouraging moms that THEY (not “experts”) knew best how to raise their kids and manage their family.
• The idea for What Should I Say? The Right (and Wrong!) Words and Deeds for Life’s Sticky, Tricky, Most Uncomfortable Situations had been rattling around in my head for a long time before I finally decided to write it, after a friend’s marriage ended in a very unexpected divorce, and another friend’s husband died in a tragic farm accident. Both of them shared with me how some people said things that hurt so much…and some people said just the right words.

I’ve done a lot of speaking in conjunction with my books, and at almost every event a few people tell me that they’ve always dreamed of writing a book or writing for publication in magazines.  I think everyone has a story—a story of their life, advice for others, or something they’d like to share.

Whether you’d like to write an article for your favorite magazine, start a blog, or publish a book, here are a few hints to getting started:

• Pray. Pray that God will guide your words and that they’ll convey the message He wants your readers (or future readers) to hear.
• Write what you know. Whether it’s coffee, kids, illness, exercise, mountain climbing, collecting postcards, find your passion and write about it.
• Write every day; a blog entry, devotion, or part of a chapter for a book you dream of writing. Whether you write for 10 minutes or much longer, when you write every day you’ll get into the habit of getting your words on paper. Some days the words may come easy, and some days they may take time, but the more you write the better you’ll get at putting the words together in a style that fits what you want to say.
• Write with excellence! If it’s an e-mail reply, note of encouragement or thanks, or even a text message, pay attention to grammar, spelling, and clarity. 
• Read. Read a variety of books, magazines, and blogs. As you read, make a note of  what you enjoy about how the books are set up, even copy sentences that are well written, make you laugh, or get their message across. Write down ideas you get for your own articles and/or books. When you read you’ll learn about the subject of the article, book or blog, and you’ll subconsciously learn how to write tighter and more effectively. As well as reading about things you already know you’re interested in, read about things that are totally new to you. You’ll stretch your brain, learn something, and maybe find a new interest!
• Take advantage of opportunities to write. Offer to write about a new organization for your company or church newsletter. Take the plunge and start a blog! (Before you start, however, make sure you have a good idea of what it will be about and plan out at least a month of entries. It’s more work than you think!) Consider submitting your writing to your town newspaper, a blog you enjoy, or even magazine (writer’s guidelines can be found online).
• Be encouraged! You ARE a writer, whether you are speaking to thousands or just a few. You’ll eventually use everything you write, in a book, blog, devotion, etc. If writing is what God has in mind for you, no words are wasted. They will all be used someday, in some way.

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord,

 not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. 

It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

            Colossians 3:23-24

I’m also doing the A to Z Blogging Challenge at my other blog, Nebraska Family Times. Today I’m writing “From the Heart.” 

Blogging from A to Z Challenge, "Goals"

“Goals”

How many goals did you set prior to Jan. 1 of this year? And how many of them have you accomplished? How many are you still working on? How many of them do you actually remember? Um...yeah, me too. 

While our society is very goal-oriented, it can be difficult to make good goals that you'll be able to work towards and achieve. Setting and working towards goals, though, gives a focus to your work—whether work as a mom, home-manager, nurse, or any other occupation. And reaching a goal gives a feeling of satisfaction and confidence.

Use these simple goal-setting guidelines and steps to improve yourself and/or evaluate your work as a mom as a business owner, or to assess how you’re doing as a home manager (which all moms are, whether or not they have a paying, out-of-home job).

To be Effective, Goals Must Be…

1. Measurable. You must be able to measure your goal so you can tell whether you’ve met it or not.

o       It’s impossible to measure goals like, “I will exercise more” or “This year I’m going to save money.”

o       You can, however, measure these goals: “I will walk for 30 minutes a day, three or four times a week” or “I will save $100 every month.”

o       Goals don’t have to contain numbers to be measurable, as long as you yourself can measure them. For example, one of my goals is, “My home will be clean enough that I will be comfortable if a guest drops by unexpectedly.” Feeling “comfortable” is different for everyone, but I can measure my own personal level of “comfortable.”

2. Attainable/realistic. Good goals make you stretch a little to meet them but are not set so high that they’re unreachable. For example, “I will lose 25 lbs. for swimsuit season, in two months,” is not attainable! A more realistic goal might be, “I will lose 1 lb. a week for the next two months.”
3. Meaningful. If you don’t care about having an immaculate lawn and huge garden, you’ll have a hard time working toward that goal. If you hate doing crunches, don’t make them part of your exercise routine!

 How to Set Goals

1. Write them down and share them with someone. Writing down goals makes them real and commits you to working on them and sharing them with someone else makes you accountable. You’ll be much more likely to stick to your exercise routine when you know a friend is going to ask you if you’ve done it!
2. Document results. Keep track of your progress by putting a star on your calendar when you exercise or keep a journal of the money you’ve saved. You’ll feel a sense of accomplishment at working toward and meeting your goals, and having visible proof will provide evidence of what you’re doing.
3. Make intermediate goals. If you have a big goal, or a long-term one, you’ll need intermediate goals. For example, if your goal is “Clean my whole house, basement to attic, including all of the drawers and closets, by this time next year,” you’ll be overwhelmed without smaller goals. Your intermediate goals might include, “This month I’ll clean my bedroom. Next month I’ll clean all of the storage room in the basement.”
4. Evaluate your goals. Evaluate each goal a month or so after you make it. If you’ve met the goal, congratulations! It’s time to make a new goal.

o       If you haven’t met it, however, re-evaluate your goal. Did you not meet it because it was unrealistic? If so, re-write it. Was it not met because of unanticipated circumstances, like a car repair bill or illness? Try it for another month. Is the goal still important to you? If not, drop it or change it to a goal that does matter to you.

o       It’s OK to revise, change, or even drop your goals. They’re not set in stone, they’re a stepping stone to what and where and who you want to be.

5. Give yourself rewards! This is the FUN part of making goals. Along with the satisfaction of meeting your goals, rewards will motivate you! Just don’t reward a week of regular exercising with a hot fudge sundae! Base rewards on what motivates you. Maybe you’ll reward your regular exercise with a new workout shirt, or getting your closet cleaned by soaking in a bubble bath while reading a new novel.

 Don’t be intimidated by all of these guidelines and steps to making your goals! The process is vital and really very simple to follow. You’ll feel a wonderful sense of accomplishment when you work toward and meet your goals!  

Home is Where the Mom Is; A Christian Mom’s Guide to Caring for Herself, Her Family, and Her Home lists suggested goals at the end of each chapter so readers can, if they want to work on that area of their lives, measure their accomplishments.

I’m also blogging at www.nebraskafamilytimes.blogspot.com, my other blog. Check out today’s post, titled “Gravel Roads.” 

Blogging A to Z Challenge

“55 Things you can do in Just Five Minutes”

AND "Freebie Friday!"

It’s Freebie Friday! When you comment on this blog entry you’ll be entered to win one of three personally autographed copies of Home is Where the Mom Is; A Christian Mom’s Guide to Caring for Herself, Her Family, and Her Home. Winners will be randomly chosen from the comments. Tell me what you can do in just five minutes, or which of these suggestions you’re going to try next time you have a few minutes to spare. Winners will be notified by e-mail, so please make sure we can click on your name and contact you for your address and to whom you’d like the book autographed. GOOD LUCK!

You’re waiting for the kids to collect everything they need before you drive them to school. Or you’re husband is just finishing a phone call before you head out for a date. Or the pork chops are almost done defrosting in the microwave.

Rather than “frittering the time away” (as my wise father would say), challenge yourself to accomplish something. You’ll be surprised at what you can accomplish in just a few minutes! This is by no means a complete list, but will get you into the habit of using even just a few minutes to do a simple task.

In your bedroom:

1. Organize one dresser drawer.
2. Straighten your shoes.
3. Sort the stuff on your bedside table.
4. Give your husband a long hug and a big kiss.

In the kitchen:

5. Clear out the dishwasher (I’ve timed myself—it usually takes less than 3 minutes).
6. Discard leftovers from the refrigerator.
7. Go through the pantry and make a grocery list.
8. Start your meal plan for the next week.
9. Clean one cupboard.
10. When you’re cooking, brown an extra pound of hamburger so you can make a quick casserole on a rushed day.

In the bathroom:

11. Fold a load of clothes.
12. Toss your old toothbrushes and get out new ones.
13. Clear off the counter.
14. Experiment with a new makeup look or hairstyle.
15. Check your supply of toilet paper, soup, shampoo, etc., and add to your list if any are low.

In the car:

16. Sort through the glove box.
17. Take a few deep breaths to relax.
18. Read a magazine article.
19. File or buff your finger nails.
20. Do isometric exercises; tense and relax your abs, for example.
21. Gather all of the sippy cups, empty water bottles, tissues, and loose pieces of paper in the back seat.

When you’re talking on the phone:

22. Set the table.
23. Sort laundry.
24. Iron.
25. Lotion your legs.
26. Sit with your feet up.

Before bed:

27. Get out the clothes you’ll wear in the morning.
28. Put the dishes in the dishwasher.
29. Get the first load of clothes ready to wash.
30. Talk—really talk, and listen—to your husband.
31. Read a short devotion or chapter of Proverbs.

In the living room:

32. Straighten out the DVDs.
33. Turn over and fluff the couch cushions.
34. Water the plants.
35. Pick up everything off the floor so it’s easy to vacuum.
36. Play a game of Chinese Checkers.

At your desk:

37. Write a thank-you note, or note of encouragement.
38. Look at your birthday and anniversary list for the next month and check your supply of cards for those occasions.
39. Jot down ideas for your next project.
40. Check your supply of paper clips, pens, sticky notes, etc.

Through the whole house (or at least several rooms):

41. Empty all of the wastebaskets.
42. Pick up all of the stray coats, shoes, socks, towels, etc.
43. Collect all of the glasses, dishes and silverware.
44. Spray air freshener in every room.
45. Have a tickle fight!
46. Call a friend just to say, “I’m thinking of and praying for you.”

For your health:

47. Jump rope.
48. Learn to take your pulse.
49. Walk around the block or go up and down the stairs.
50. Stretch.
51. Eat a piece of fruit.

With your kids:

52. Talk about the day.
53. Say a prayer together.
54. Play tag.
55. Hug!

 You can see from this list that there are many things you can accomplish in just a few minutes! Change your mindset; rather than thinking “It’s only a few minutes; I can’t get anything done!” challenge yourself—“What can I accomplish in five minutes?”

  

(Excerpted from Home is Where the Mom Is; A Christian Mom’s Guide to Caring for Herself, Her Family, and Her Home. For ordering information, click on the link in the sidebar.)

I’m also blogging at Nebraska Family Times. Today’s post is titled “Good Friday?”

A to Z Blogging Challenge

“Expectations—Revising Unrealistic Ones”

(Adapted from Home is Where the Mom Is; A Christian Mom’s Guide to Caring for Herself, Her Family, and Her Home. See sidebar for ordering information.)

(Be sure to check back tomorrow for "Freebie Friday"!) 

Unrealistic Expectations

Unrealistic expectations. I knew I had them when my kids were young and I was at home with them all day…but I didn’t know I’d have them even now, when I’m…um…40-something…and one child is in college and one is about to graduate.

When my kids were toddlers I expected that I would be the type of mom to sew all of their clothes (my mom sewed all of the *matching* clothes my sisters and I wore), complete multiple craft projects (again, like my mom), cook three well-balanced and yummy-tasting meals every day (my mom was a super-mom!).

                                                                                                                           

For a very long time I tried to do all of the above…feeling that I was a failure for not being just like my mom. 

Unrealistic expectations can be demoralizing to any mom, and in your life as a “real life” mom you’ll probably have to change some of your expectations about every-day activities, hobbies, and projects.

Instead of looking at decreasing your unrealistic expectations of yourself as a failure, look at it as giving priority to what is most important—your kids and your husband, and your own sanity.

Detecting Unrealistic Expectations

Whether you’re a new mom or an almost-empty-nest mom, if an item shows up on your to-do list week after week—whether it’s a dreaded chore or something that “should” be fun—ask yourself if it’s really worth doing. Despite the expectations of your in-laws or friends, it’s not necessary to move all the furniture every time you vacuum (or every other time…or…more than once every six months)!

What about “fun” things you “should” enjoy doing, like planting flowers or doing craft projects with your kids? If you don’t enjoy doing them, find something else—something you do enjoy, to do! Just because someone else finds happiness in an activity does not mean you have to. Life is to short to guilt yourself into doing something you don’t enjoy.

Revising Unrealistic Expectations (and saving your sanity)

Remember the old cliché’ “If something is worth doing, it’s worth doing right?” My motto is, “Some things are worth doing 100%, but many things can be done 50% or less and still be acceptable.” Save your sanity—lower your standards! Look at the activities on which you spend a lot of time doing to your (maybe unrealistic) and figure out how you can lower those standards.

• Rather than sort old baby clothes by age, size, and season, sort them by boy clothes and girl clothes, or by size.
• Instead of pressuring yourself to cook 21 low-fat, low-calorie, nutritionally-balanced meals every week, go with cereal for breakfast and resolve in your own mind that it’s ok to eat a frozen meal or take-out pizza a few times a week.
• You do not have to wash your windows every spring (it’s been 7 springs since I’ve washed mine. We’ve lived in our home for 7 years.) It’s ok to just vacuum the “middle” of the floor and not move anything. It’s OK to dust around things.
• Instead of baking dozens of different varieties of cookies for school kids, neighbors, teachers, Sunday School teachers, and family members, bake a batch of cupcakes and take one to each of your favorite neighbors.
• Rather than having a huge garden and being frustrated at being unable to keep up with it, plant a few of your favorite veggies in easy-to-care for pots or other containers. I’ve satisfied my gardening “bug” by planting herbs in pots and growing them on our deck, where they’re easy to care for and use.
• If there’s something that truly has to be done, consider hiring someone else to do it. Sometimes the cost is well worth getting that thing off of your to-do list.

And don’t feel guilty about taking these measures; you and your family will benefit from the extra time you have to spend with them, and the better mood you’ll be in. And remember that “There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven.”( Ecclesiastes 3:1) Throughout you life your schedule and commitments will change, and with that what you are able to do, will also change.

It’s bittersweet to know that next fall will start empty-nest time for me. On the one hand, I’ll have a lot more time to work on the Nebraska Family Times and write. But of course it’s going to be a huge change to not have our kids at home! I am going to enjoy every moment of the time before they both leave for college…I can move all the furniture when I vacuum when they’ve both gone back to college.

I’m also taking part in the Blogging A to Z Challenge on my other blog, at Nebraska Family Times. Check there today for a devotion about “God’s Ear.” 

Blogging A to Z Challenge

“Distractions”

Yesterday I encouraged you to care for your spirit, and today I’m going to give some hints for dealing with the distractions that will try to keep you away from doing just that.

I remember one day a year or so ago when I was excited about reading the Bible, starting with Genesis. I was so eager to read the Creation story, take notes, journal, and really get “into” what I was reading.

My plan was to get a few things done around the house—start a load of laundry, put supper in the crockpot, and return an urgent e-mail—and then start.

I did those things and eagerly sat down to begin reading.

Within two minutes, the dog wanted to go outside. I let her out, then in, gave her a treat, and sat back down. The cat wanted out. I remembered something I’d forgotten in my e-mail, and sent another before I forgot—again!—what I’d forgotten the first time. The buzzer on the dryer went off and I got the clothes out before they wrinkled (I hate to iron).

I read a few more verses…and the cat wanted back in. The dog wanted out again. Supper in the crock pot needed to be stirred. The dog wanted to come in. The other cat wanted to go out.

Finally I decided to sit outside and read to get away from the distractions in the house. I got all settled with my Bible and journal…and realized I’d forgotten a pen. Got settled again…and the dog, lonely inside, wanted to come out and sit by me. Read a few verses and realized the sun was a little hot and I needed something to drink.

And so it went. Distractions prevented me from reading more than a few verses of Genesis on that day. I am convinced that the devil uses distractions to keep us from nurturing our spiritual life. And he is sneaky about it! After all, all of my “distractions” were things I “had” to do, and it was easy to convince myself that I “had” to take care of the distractions in the midst of—or before I began—my Bible study.

After a few days of Bible study times like this, I decided I had to be proactive in getting rid of or minimizing these distractions. If you get distracted during Bible study, try some of these tips:

• Time of Day: Through trial and error I found that early morning—before anyone is up (besides the dog and cats…more about them later)—is the best time for me to do Bible study. I pray every day for the desire to get up early—and I go to bed early as well. Find the time of day that is best for you!
•  Place: Designate a place for devotions; a desk or comfy chair in the corner of your bedroom. I use an old computer desk that didn’t fit in my husband’s office, and a low coffee table acts as a bookshelf.
• Supplies: Gather everything you’ll need; Bible, Bible study books, journal, pens and/or pencils, etc., and arrange them on your Bible study desk or on a coffee table or in a basket where you’ll be doing your study.
• I have sticky notes on my desk (or in my basket) so when I remember a task or “to-do” I can jot it down right then and there and get my mind back on the Bible. I also have notecards on which to write verses that touch my heart, Kleenexes, and a bottle of Tums for those days my acid reflux acts up. I leave a fuzzy robe or blanket in my office for chilly winter mornings. Anticipate things that will make your time special; I often mix up hot chocolate or chai for a treat during that time.
• Prepare: I’ve realized that our dog inevitably hears me and gets up when I do, no matter how early it is! Before I sit down to do Bible study I let her out, let her in, and give her her breakfast. If you do your study during the day, consider turning the phone off (or bringing it with you so you don’t have to run for it; use caller ID to see if you truly need to answer).  Check supper, put another load of laundry in—and if you forget to do these things before you start, don’t interrupt your study, jot the task on a sticky note and do it later.
• Priority: Make Bible study a priority. If you choose to do your study when your kids are napping, after your husband goes to work, or before bed, DO your study right after the kids go to bed (trying to start supper first guarantees a “no nap” day), immediately after your husband leaves (no “quick” phone call first) or right when you crawl into bed (before you turn the TV on.) I don’t turn my computer on until after I’ve done my study; if I do, I’m sure to be distracted by e-mails I “have” to return right away. Determine to not let anything that is not of critical importance (a crying baby or the smell of smoke) interrupt your time.

• Pray for God to help you keep your mind focused, and guard you from distractions. Here are several verses that I use:
• “May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in Your sight, O Lord, my Rock and My Redeemer.” Psalm 19:14
• “Open my eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of Your law.” Psalm 119:18
• “Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10

 These are suggestions, not rules! Depending on the age of your children, out of home commitments, and your own personal schedule, you might have to modify these suggestions. Remember that it’s ok to change your schedule according to events in your home or the rhythm of your life; for example, I can’t sit outside to do Bible study during the Nebraska winter! When I’m convinced spring is here to stay, I’ll gather my tools in a basket again so I can easily take them outside.

What are your tips for dealing with distractions during Bible study time? 

Share them in the comments.

 (I’m also doing the A to Z Challenge at my other blog at the Nebraska Family Times , where I’m blogging about “Spiritual Discernment” today.)